Issue No. 29︱Monday, September 23, 2024

So, what is it to you?

When you think of utopia, what do you see? Is it a green-filled city? or a land full of rural, dispersed houses? Perhaps utopia for you is a cyberpunk world full of smoke and neon lights. To really imagine your own utopia, we have to know what utopia even is.

A utopia is a place where its residents live in a near-perfect world. Though utopia seemingly doesn’t actually exist. It was a term created in 1516 by Sir Thomas More, who published a book by the title Utopia, where he compared the state of Europe to a fictional island where life was bliss and ideal. He wanted to imply that living in such a world could never be a possibility, so he called it utopia by combining the Greek words "ou," meaning no or not, and "topos," meaning place. So utopia literally means no place.

So while the meaning of utopia is literally denying that it’s real, is it true? Can there really never be any place on earth where the residents are truly happy and satisfied with life? Where their every need is met and they can thrive? It seems so far this statement reigns true, as it’s been nearly 500 years since the idea was first brought forth, and yet we’re nowhere close to achieving it.

Many forms of utopia depicted in creative works, such as books and movies, show that utopia isn’t always what everyone would seem. There’s always something dark hidden behind the seemingly blissful lives of its residents. Really, how can utopia be fitting for everyone who lives there? Surely most would find it comfortable, but not everyone is the same. An ideal world for one can be drastically different from another. So, ignoring that the word literally means "no place," can utopia truly exist?

So now that you know all about what utopia really is, do you believe we could even live in one? Or are we destined to live in a dystopia? What do you even think utopia could be? If I were to describe my ideal world, would you agree? If you were forced to live in my utopia, would you truly be happy? While you can imagine what your own utopia would look like, it’s easy to forget that not everyone would like to live in the same world. We all have our own desires and visions for a perfect world. It seems these differences will keep us all apart for 5 more centuries to come…

Ghost Hunter’s Tale

It was your classic campfire setting: A group of friends were gathered around the flames, roasting marshmallows. It wasn’t long before one friend brought up the idea of telling spooky stories. They loved the idea and took turns telling the scariest stories they could think of until they got to that one friend. He was a tall, burly man who kept to himself but enjoyed the company of his companions. He didn’t have much interest in the tales, but one friend insisted, saying, “Come on, man! I bet you have great stories to tell, being a ghost hunter and all.” There was a bit of a snicker around the group. The man looked at them with distaste, then gave them what they wanted.

The 2 ghost hunting men approached the abandoned structures that once made up a small town, one with caution, the other with so much carefree bliss you’d think he was at a resort. This place was once a thriving little place, but after the incident, many moved away, and like most small towns, it became nothing more than a place full of memories and abandonment. The pair walked, approached every building, explored all they could, and tried reaching out to any spirits that may still linger. The night had so far been a bit of a bore, with one man claiming every little sound heard was hard evidence of an afterlife and the other debunking his partner while cracking a few jokes.

They finally made their way to the main building of the night, where the incident took place. The cautionary man let his friend know what had happened here. There was a mother who, seemingly possessed by something evil, took her own children’s lives in a brutal and ruthless way. They entered the house and tried to make contact with either the children or the mother. Their investigation led them to what was left of the kitchen. Where the humorous one made some jokes about the family's last meal. There was no real response anywhere in the house, so they went to where the events of the incident took place: the basement.

For this, they decided to go in one at a time. The carefree man offered to go first while the believer stood outside waiting. He walked down into the basement gleefully and full of excitement. He couldn’t wait to tease all the “ghosts” that could be lingering about. He shouted, danced, and made light of the situation. That was, until in the middle of one of his shouts, there was a noise from the corner of the room. He went quiet and looked over, still unafraid. There seemed to be something manifesting in the dark, but it was too difficult to see. Just as you’d expect, his light went out. Outside, the other man frighteningly waited for his partner's return. much time had passed, so tried to radio him. Silence. He thought to make his way to the house, but as he took his first step, the house burst up in flames and collapsed, with his friend still inside. Maybe people should take ghosts more seriously.

The Start of 2024

I am a dragon, so naturally, I thought this would be my year. Yes, I realize I have doxed which year I was born in. Which means I could have been born in 2012, 2000, 1988, 1976, 1964, 1952, etc. But I’ll give you a hint: it’s none of those years. Then I found out that people who are dragons have a hard time in the year of the dragon because the dragon is jealous that anyone shares his year. I thought, "Oh well, that’s a bunch of bullshit," but now, after the year I’ve had, I fully believe it. I’m begging for the year of the dragon to end. Maybe I should have worn some red accessories this year.

I should have known it wasn’t going to be my year after the way it started. I was binge watching Game of Thrones and wanted to get some Chinese takeout so I could get a calendar. I had gotten a calendar from my usual takeout place for the past 2 years, and I really wanted one for this year because I’m a dragon. Well, I got there too late. They were already out of calendars, and to make it all worse, the food wasn’t very good. They even forgot the fortune cookies.

It all went downhill from there. A couple of weeks after new years, I had a foot injury. Then, just as things seemed to be looking up, the eclipse happened. I was excited for this and got to watch it from my backyard, but just a few days after that is when things really took a turn for the worst. My neighbors were causing a ruckus. I had new neighbors move in next door, with kids so loud and annoying, a preschool teacher couldn’t handle them. I had a mystery pain pop up. My health declined rapidly to the point of surgery. My car broke down; I could go on and on, but I shall not. I’m just ready for this year to be over.

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Apple Cider Vinegar Day

It’s acidic and ruins your enamel. What is it? It’s apple cider vinegar, of course! And September 23rd is the day for it. Just make sure to use a straw to drink it. Will a tablespoon a day actually help with weight loss? I’m not sure; please tell me.

Punctuation Day

September 24th

It’s finally Punctuation Day! This is my favorite holiday because Im so good at punctuation Im always telling others how they could improve their writing and how terrible their punctuation is Theyre always saying Thank you for knowing so much about punctuation If it werent for you no one would be able to read my writing

Binge Day

September 25th

Binge Day is the perfect time for you to start and finish that show you’ve been wanting to watch. Nothing is better than spending hours of your day fully engrossed in a good show. Personally, I never want to binge-watch a show ever again. Nothing feels worse to me than spending hours of my day fully engrossed in a good show. I’ll finish a show and feel like reality has shifted. No thanks.

Dream Day

September 25th

Dream Day is all about thinking about what you want. What ideas do you have? What can you do to make them real? In all of your greatest dreams, what do you see? All a girl dreams of is dead rats, mold, and sewage water.

Pancake Day

September 26th

Stack the flapjacks. The hotcakes. The pancakes; it’s Pancake Day! Yummy, warm pancakes stacked to high with perfectly melted butter pooling on the top and sticky, sweet syrup oozing from all sides. Get ready to feast and see just how many you can eat! Be sure to add any topping you want for an even better pancake experience.

Thank you for reading the blugg newspaper.